Good Mornings begin with coffee....

So I am finally going to work....I am so happy that I love my job...otherwise going away would be that much more difficult..

I hope that Tia will be okay..I know she is safe..warm..fed..and getting sober. I can only hope that this will help her..I am very worried about the influences around her...

I am ready for good things to happen!! :-)..I was able to clean out my house while I've been home..it feels so good to be more organized...last week I threw out 9 bags of trash and this week 4 more...how in the world does one person collect so much junk??..Anyways..glad I was able to get the house in order...

I am looking forward to the weekend...I love spending time with Avery...of course I enjoy Britt and Nick as well..but nothing is better than a grandchild!!! Who would have thought you could love being a grandma so much...its the best!!!

Okay...off I go...

Tia Update...

Okay...so I'll try to be brief...Tia ran away Friday..not really ran..went with her friends against her court ordered house arrest...she turned herself in on Saturday afternoon....today was the first day I was able to see her...it was very difficult to watch her walk in handcuffed and chained...she would not look at me...she has been ordered to 45 days of evaluation and 10 more days in DT... I have very mixed emotions...I wish that this were all some crazy nightmare and Tia was the same little girl I had living with me last year... I feel so sad for her and wish that she could get past these next few years with minimal damage....one can hope..

On a lighter note..I miss Smash...I was able to chat with her via facebook this morning....she is having a hard time getting the classes she needs to get her degree...I'm sure that has to be so frustrating but she is going to be the best teacher.....

Sundays are for preparing......

Okay...not much sleep...tossed and turned thinking about Tia...was she warm..comfortable..sad..mad..not knowing these things is very hard...I wish I could have had a conversation with her and calmed her fears...does she know how much I love her and want nothing but good things for her? I hope so...and if not..I hope to have a chance to let her know very soon....

I am going to stay busy today..I meant to do just that yesterday but found myself in a fog switching from reading to playing word challenge on face book...boy do I love to play that game!! It was a true life saver last night....if my thoughts started to wander..I started playing the game....

I think I will cook up a storm today...I enjoy cooking but sometimes it feels like such a waste because it's just me and I end up throwing so much food out...today I will throw caution to the wind..it will be very therapeutic(sp?)...maybe bread...I always struggle with yeast...I know that I shouldn't being that I have been able to take a few extra pounds off and feel so much better...oh well..

I hope that today is one filled with good thoughts..I am going to try very hard..I tend to be negative and forget how lucky I am and how many blessings I receive on a daily basis...I know that if I just quiet my thoughts and be still..there are answers all around me...I have amazing children who in one way or another make me so proud...I have a job that I love...I have friends who always seem to know the right things to say...I am loved....

And so it begins...

I wish that I could fast forward a few years and see a very happy girl who finally realizes her worth in this world...Tia has been arrested...at 15..I can't imagine what might be going through her head...I hope she can feel my love and know that I wish I could take all this pain away...I never imagined being a parent came with this kind of a heartache...the guilt of what could I have done differently keeps haunting my mind...I can't talk to her or see her until monday or tuesday...my heart physically hurts...I feel so sad and wish that I weren't sitting here alone...I need some sort of distraction..will this change Tias path for the better or the worse?? If ever I needed to feel that a higher power was with her and watching over her..it would right now...I have prayed more in the past 5 hours than I think I have in the past 30 years....

Oh my.....

Well...this is starting out to be a year with new lessons and a few set backs...I want to try and be consistant in journaling all that it going on..which is hard because I am on the road so much..but I want to be able to look back and relive some of the great memories throughout the year and learn from some of the mistakes I am bound to make..lol...so this might be a little personal and TMI for a blog but I am going to do my best to keep it simple....

1-01-11....Looks to be a GREAT YEAR....

Happy New Year!! I think good things will happen this year..with the numerology it has to mean something...right? I am looking forward to this year and having many good times with my family and friends!! My New Years resolution is to be a better friend and take extra time with the ones I love...I feel like last year was a blur of working too much and too much focus on issues I have no control over...so this year I hope to make many wonderful memories!!!!

I am so blessed......

Okay..so I have been super busy trying to be prepared for Christmas...a few set backs with Tia has made my time limited...I don't mind..she is my daughter and I love her and want her to be happy...if she could just get through these teenage years with minimal damage....we'll see!! I have the most amazing children..they bring me so much happiness....we had an awesome Christmas...I was going to make a turkey however it wasn't thawed and my kids teased me about last years Thanksgiving dinner and the extra 3 hours we waited for the turkey to be done...so breakfast feast it was!! lol...I have forgotten to mention that "Fell" is back from his mission.....yay!!! He has been in Australia for the past 2 years and is back with a bit of an accent!!! Ashley is a bundle of emotion..haha..happy,relieved,content...you get the picture...:-)..I'll update more later...

Day 19..A picture of someone I miss...

Why is it that you never appreciate something until it's or "they're" far away!!!! My sister Dawn moved to Omaha and for the last 5 years she was 20 minutes away and we never got together on a regular basis...silly I tell you!!

Day 14...Someone I could not picyure living without,,,

This is going to be obvious...and I cannot just pick one..there are 4..they have been my joy and my reason for smiling,laughing,crying...breathing....

Day 13..catching up....Things I hate......

                                                    I HATE mice!!!

                                                                I hate being COLD!!

                                                                 I hate car trouble!!    

Mondays...let the to do list begin...

Okay, so Ash helped me get this thing going and now I am going to copy her..and Britt for that matter and post each day pics from a list the two have on their blogs.....

I love being a grandma to this sweetheart!!!!

Today is to post something you love....I am having a hard time picking any one thing...hmmmm...

                                                I LOVE my family..I am so blessed!!!

I also want to say that I do love my job....after 16 almost 17 years with SWA...it has been a blessing in diguise...I have met many wonderful friends and been able to explore so much!!! I am very lucky!!

Sundays are the best...

 So yesterday I had the best day.....First I got to enjoy breakfast with Ashley and chat a bit..it's nice to catch up with her..she is pretty excited for Feller to get home from his mfission in a few days....then I got to hang with my grandaughter Avery...we watched Shrek ( of course) and then went to my friend Lyndas open house...Avery was all smiles and such a treat to be with!!!!! She ate tons of sugary treats so I expected her to be bouncing off the walls..but lucky for me, she took a nap and then we headed to dinner with Britt and Nick...thank you for letting me have Aves and  making my day!!!

 Friday night I got the pleasure of going to the Jazz game with my friend Gina!! She has season tickets with awesome seats..I get to be her date when her husband is out of town....we had soooo much fun..we went to Gracies after the game and listened to some good jazz music...

So..a great weekend had by all I think!! I am sitting here updating this blog and watching the most beautiful baby!!(Avery)..and YES..we are watching Shrek...Britt and Nick have gone shopping and the best part is that Britt is going to pick up some Christmas presents for me..how lucky am I??!! Avery, and presents being purchased without having to go to the mall....YES!!!!!

Hello Blog World!

Okay...so I am just learning how to do a blog...so there will be more info and pictures to follow..Ash is helping me get this started..I am finding it quite hard to write about myself !! I guess this is a way to update family status and the daily , weekly,  or monthly grind...not sure ...hmmmm...